somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
