I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
