Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.