Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
