Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
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I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
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I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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