Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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