belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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