I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
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