a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
this will be a night to untag.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Randomize
