Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?