two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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