You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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