did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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