He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
he shaved USA in his pubs
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
