awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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