ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize