listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize