oh god the rape fog is back!
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
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