Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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