Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
