Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
