It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay