Well apparently he's into motor boating.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
