I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
