I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
