your room smells of hookers.
And success
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Randomize
