I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
