found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I fill condoms, not promises.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
