Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
