Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
