Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
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you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
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I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.