you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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