Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize