girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
only you would photoshop your dick
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Randomize
