We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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