I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
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