i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Randomize
