meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
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