i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
He better not be in your backpack
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
