you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
But theres a keg here and me gusta
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
