and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.