1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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