He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
