So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
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