my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
whose parrot is this?
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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