i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
