how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
