Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
