oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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