...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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